I was just thinking about how often I’ve been told how brave I am for speaking up and expressing myself, across many different situations. I assume that those who have said this to me must perceive it as dangerous or scary because they use the word brave.
Here’s an example:
I had just started seeing someone and I mentioned to a friend that I sent a text, telling him I was thinking about him, to which she told me how brave it was. And, I had no idea why she thought it was brave. It was just one sentence. I told him I was thinking about him because I was thinking about him. I told him because it was true.
To be fair, there was a period when this would have felt horrifying. And, at the time, I had no idea how horrible it felt to keep so much inside, with no outlet. I didn’t know the importance of self-expression. I didn’t know I needed the sense of relief that comes with that outlet. I was just terrified of what might come back at me, as if expressing my thoughts and feelings was a crime. But, the reason this example seemed so foreign to me was that I had, thankfully, released that fear quite some time before.
I suppose the dangerous/scary part was the idea of expressing my feelings, and the brave part was having the courage to actually express them.
I have been binging on Gary Vaynerchuk’s YouTube videos, I love his candor, pragmatism and approach to building/growing your business. One of the things he says, in addressing the excuses entrepreneurs make when things aren’t going “as planned,” is that nobody cares. Nobody is interested in the “whys’ or ‘what’s.’ He, more or less, says “Shut up and do the work..nobody gives a shit about you!”
With regard to this scenario, I totally agree with him. I often struggle with committing to fully immersing myself in building my brand. But, in spite of the fact that it can be overwhelming, I know creating valuable content, getting my voice out there and providing a remarkable service, is essential for success. I know that nobody cares to hear ANY of the reasons I may (think) I have for not doing what needs to get done – except maybe those interested in commiserating.
Within the corporate world, this statement is also true. In the first scenario it is essential to know and should be embraced. The second scenario creates toxicity and is one of the fundamental reasons for the slow demise of businesses. (more…)
No, that’s not a typo in the title. I meant now, not new. I’ll explain.
First, let’s start by looking at how the term New Normal came about…this is according to Wikipedia.
“New Normal is a term in business and economics that refers to financial conditions following the financial crisis of 2007-2008 and the aftermath of the 2008 – 2012 global recession. The term has since been used in a variety of other contexts to imply that something which was previously abnormal has become commonplace.”
Did anyone else know that first part? I didn’t. But, nevertheless, it’s the second part that I’m focusing on. The “something which was previously abnormal has become commonplace” part. (more…)
It’s really crazy that bashing an entire generation is perfectly acceptable. It’s crazy that it’s ok to openly discriminate and make sweeping generalizations about this group we call Millennials. They’re a problem, they’re entitled, they’re lazy and have a bad work ethic, they do the most unthinkable thing by ASKING QUESTIONS! THEY WANT FEEDBACK! THEY DON’T BLINDLY FOLLOW THE STATUS QUO!
I mean if they are not the devil incarnate, who is?
The number one way to not suck, suck less or do well at selling is to stop selling.
Stop trying to sell !! (more…)
First let me start by giving you the definitions of Leadership found on Merriam-Webster.com:
At some point, when eating in a restaurant, I’m sure you’ve asked your server what he/she recommends. “What’s good on the menu?” is not an uncommon question to ask. But, what I’ve always found to be odd about this question is that we are asking a total stranger, whose opinion and/or taste is unknown. We don’t know what they like or don’t like. We don’t know what their definition of good is. So the answer is completely subjective and their answers probably include a number of variables. If they say, “Oh, the chicken dish is amazing! I always get that” or, “The chicken dish is very popular,” do we ask why or what makes it popular or amazing? Probably not. I never have. And, even if we did ask, the explanation is still subjective because it’s all based on other’s tastes/opinions.
One of the things that comes up, pretty often, with my clients (and friends, for that matter) are challenges with trying to making a decision or figuring out how to do something. And, sometimes the challenge can feel so big that it stops them from moving forward. They get stuck, feel helpless or frustrated and, ultimately, feel that they are failing, in some particular way, because there is a sense that it should be easier. When they tell me they don’t know what to do, some of the words that come up are stuck, frustrated, helpless and failure. I hear things like “It should be easier,” “there must be something wrong with me,” “I should know how to do this, what’s wrong with me?”
Saying I can’t is almost always not true. It’s an unintentional lie we tell ourselves or others. It’s a lie used as an excuse. A lie that results in inaction. A lie that gives us a pass. A lie that feels bad. (more…)
If you’re a Small Business Owner, Entrepreneur or Solopreneurs, I’m guessing you struggle with setting your fees. I’m also guessing that the “number” you land on is a number you think someone will pay, not the number you actually want. As a Business & Life Strategist, working with people in this arena, I almost never hear a client tell me they are getting paid what they want. So, if charging more for your services/products is something you struggle with, please know you’re not alone. It is also a challenge for executives in salary negotiations. (more…)